Saturday, June 25, 2016

Naming your imaginary friend - Ea Chaun Seng edition

Do you ever blame your parents for your shitty name? Don't get me wrong, Aki's pretty bad if you ask me, especially when it sounds feminine.

That said, enter Arlose John. Your friendly neighborhood ghost hunter, aka manchild 101. Well, no parents would name their own child a loser. Unfortunately, that's not the case for Arlose here. So, to compensate his shitty name, he went for a shittier name, Arwin John. For anyone who has half a brain, you'd probably want to change your name to be better one - but not our dear Arwin.

However, thanks to his shitty name, and probably him being retard and a manchild at the same time, Arwin has almost no friends. You'd probably ask, "but Aki, I believe all manchilds have no friend!" Well, let's not be hard on him and give him a benefit of doubt. Back to our story, to compensate being lonely and yearning for friends, he made up imaginary friends. But, what shall he name his friends? Arwin has a great idea - why not use the formula of his name: shitty name + regular name combo. And there comes his great imaginary friend: Marvik Max!

As time passes, Arwin realizes that having a good "friend" is not enough; he now wants a girlfriend. However, as I've previously said, as a manchild, Arwin can find no girlfriend. Well, what do you do, if you're Arwin? That's right! Imaginary girlfriend! Using his great formula of naming, introducing Alice Kezar!

Usually, one would be grateful and satisfied to have a caring "friend" and loving "girlfriend". Unfortunately, we're talking about Arwin. To compensate his inflated ego and microscopic dick, he declared himself as Arwin John Raul Gonzalez VII. You know what? Let's not just stop there, let's inflate the ego more by creating a shitty Facebook page showing off shit that no one gives a fuck by ripping off a great game.

In conclusion, our manchild here has a great formula for naming. Always remember the formula whenever you need to name an imaginary friend. Oh, and plagiarize anything if you want to create substandard content to inflate your ego.




/sidenote: in peace, love, and fats